We Can be Our Own Worst Enemy

One of the major traps we can fall into is believing we either can’t achieve better, or we don’t deserve better than the cards we have been dealt. It is very easy to be stuck in the cycle of victimhood. I have seen it in many forms over decades and the only person it’s hurting is you. I recently had the pleasure of hearing Dr Michael Maiden speak and he said something I knew I needed to share. “Victims get attention but they don’t get better.” Maybe you have been hurt by someone, perhaps a divorce, a business venture, toxic       workplace or maybe you feel bound by the rules of Centrelink. This may be a topic to challenge you. I see many people who stay in the low-income zone as they start to lose benefits as they earn more. Usually, they are still better off however it feels like a punishment. It can be hard to see past this to the ‘tipping point’ where the benefits outweigh the loss. Sometimes it’s generational and all you have known and there is fear of breaking the cycle and fear of failing. It’s ok to fail. If it doesn’t work, try something else.  When I was 18 years old, and working in the bank, I would take all the overtime I was offered. I was surprised that many people refused overtime as you ‘paid more tax’. Yes, I paid higher tax on my overtime but I still ended up with more in my pocket.

I didn’t have the option to live at home. My husband and I were doing everything we could to cover rent, bills and save every dollar possible. It wasn’t much, and the idea of a 20% deposit on a house one day seemed impossible. However, every little bit helped and it added up. It would not have been possible to save back then without the ‘small things.’  

Sometimes we even hurt our finances to hurt someone else. Like quitting a high paying job so our Ex will pay more child support. Or keeping our dreams contained out of fear we may succeed and benefit them. Essentially, drinking the poison and hoping someone else will die. Keep praying for those who hurt you, even when you don’t want to. It will help you overcome these feelings, and you will be able to focus on your future and the blessings to come even if they mean you are blessing someone who hurt you.

“Forget the former things; do not dwell on the past. See, I am doing a new thing! Now it springs up; do you not perceive it?”

       - Isaiah 43:18-19